I love this essay from Will Roberts’ mom
Brittney- so honest and vulnerable.
We’ll forgive you Brittney- thanks for all you do for Will and your family! 
Brittney writes:
“Let me go ahead and say it before Jason and the holy folks do… “I know she didn’t just admit that on social media…..”
“Oh, but I did.
“Saturday night I met up with friends, drank a fishbowl-sized margarita like I didn’t have a care in the world, and went to gamble a little. I was a sinner in more ways than one…
“Now here’s the part that made me feel slightly better about my life choices.
I won $100 within 20 minutes and cashed out like a responsible adult… then sat back, listened to a live band, and laughed with friends for a while.
“And before y’all start warming up that Southern Baptist backlash… I turned around and donated that and then some to families walking this same road we are.
I’ll be honest… I even tried to justify it in my own head.
Twisting the scriptures to make it fit my agenda.
“And for a few hours… it did.
It felt good.
Like I could forget everything.
Like I could breathe without that weight sitting on my chest.
“But here’s the rest of the truth.
Sunday morning came… and that little headache showed up… and so did every single thing I was trying to escape because alcohol might numb it for a minute, but it doesn’t fix a thing.
It just waits on you to wake up.
“I almost didn’t go to church.
“And if I hadn’t… I would’ve missed the message I needed more than anything.
“The sermon was about Jairus (Mark 5:21–43)… a father who came to Jesus desperate, begging Him to come heal his little girl.
“Before Jesus even made it there, people came and told him, ‘Don’t bother anymore… your daughter is dead.’
“I sat there thinking about what Jairus must have felt… and I cried through most of the service because in that moment… I felt like Jairus and if I’m being really honest… I also felt like one of the ones who doubted… the ones who thought, ‘it’s too far gone’, and like one of the ones who mocked Jesus.
“But Jesus looked at Jairus and said, ‘Do not be afraid; only believe”, and He kept going anyway.
He walked into that house where everyone else had already accepted the ending, took her by the hand and said, ‘Little girl, I say to you, arise.’
“And she got up.
“That hit me hard.
“Because I realized…
“I can try to escape it, distract myself, push it down for a few hours… but it’s all still there waiting but Jesus doesn’t stop showing up just because things look too far gone.
“Not in Jairus’ story… and not in mine either.
“So yeah… I had my ‘fishbowl margarita’ moment. My ‘I’m up $100’ moment and my ‘give it right back where it matters’ moment.
“But most importantly… I showed up Sunday anyway with a sinner’s heart and all, to learn that when all hope looks lost… be a Jairus.
“Be the parent who keeps walking toward Jesus even when the news says stop, who keeps believing when everything around you says it’s over and who doesn’t let fear have the final say.
“So when it comes to Will… even on the days my heart knows what it’s up against… I’ll still choose to walk forward, choose to believe, and I’ll still call on Him like Jairus did… again and again.
“Because as long as Jesus is still walking… hope isn’t gone.
“And maybe that’s the whole point… He meets us right there… not when we’ve got it all together… but when we’re just willing to walk through the door anyway, even with a sinners heart!!!
“I feel me choosing to walk through that door Sunday morning nursing a headache was to hear that sermon in preparation for where this cancer journey is leading…..for me to not lose hope.”
Thanks again to Brittney as she continues to help care for Will, who is fighting bone cancer.
And remember, you can follow Will’s journey on Facebook at Brittney Battles Roberts
